Thread: Terrified..

Hey guys!

Thanks for all your thoughts of help and suggestions, it's been very kind of you all .
I have changed a lot of my personal details as a lot of you suggested and agree that it could possibly well be someone within my work. I never replied to he/she and have saved the message, but what I found extremely bizarre, is that this person had just joined My Space for about 10 minutes before sending me this message. So they obviously had the intention of finding me and sending this! Also, the avatar was blank so I don't have a hint at who it might well be. But I have blocked this person and decided to just get on with things....and take into consideration how much I give out!

I think I've learned my lesson..

Whisky XX

No one sends e-mails to me on my social networking sites telling me that I'm not as clever as i think I am by trying to hide under a different name, or that my work/family/friends might find out, because they all know. I'm proud of it and don't see why it should effect my proffesional and family life.
I do get a lot of strange e-mails about ****** my **** whilst its covered in ******* then turning around and ****** them in the **** after ***** a **** with a ******** tuba player.

Originally Posted by Buck Fast

No one sends e-mails to me on my social networking sites telling me that I'm not as clever as i think I am by trying to hide under a different name, or that my work/family/friends might find out, because they all know. I'm proud of it and don't see why it should effect my proffesional and family life.
I do get a lot of strange e-mails about ****** my **** whilst its covered in ******* then turning around and ****** them in the **** after ***** a **** with a ******** tuba player.

Lol! What you like! :lol:
See the thing is, all my friends and family do know too, and they're all very supportive about it! My Parents especially, which is surprising! My work colleagues all know too and even some of them came to my last gig. I'm definitely not ashamed of what I do and I'm all one for doing what you enjoy the most in life.
I wouldn't call myself clever by hiding under another name! It's to promote/network my burlesque more than anything and that's what I use my My Space for. If you find me on Facebook/Bebo, you will find my first real name and my last surname initial as I use both of these social networking sites to stay in contact with friends. It's a stage name, an alter-ego if you will. Like Alice Copper isn't really called Alice Cooper. It's just a stage name. His real name's Vincent for crying out loud! lol.

But anyways, I thank you all again for your suggestions and hope a matter like this doesn't happen again to myself, or any one of you lovely people.

Whisky XX

After reading it over a few times, my gut feeling is it's more likely a woman. Maybe someone a little older than you and possibly someone you work with? I could be way off the mark though.
It reads as someone trying to give you a ticking off rather than someone being stalkerish. And yes, it's incredibly presumptuous and cheeky but I don't think it's intended to be threatening.

As others have said, aside from the crass and overbearing delivery, some of the points are valid. I think we've all got so used to the internet now we've become rather complacent. I always keep an image in my head of some dodgy pervy dribbling bloke sat in front of a PC and try to remember he might not live in downtown USA but just around the corner. I'm finding it tricky now, as because I'm running a business I'm legally required to put a certain amount of info 'out there'. I'm still as careful as I can be though.

Keep a copy of it and keep your ears open. I'd lay money on it being someone you know.

The bit that says "If you've just turned 18, as you say" is interesting. It implies that they don't know for sure how old you are. They also don't know your living arrangements (They're also wrong as I would say a lot of 18 year olds live alone, what with uni and everything!)

I definitely think it's someone who knows you, but maybe not directly. Perhaps a friend of a friend, or someone who is jealous of you- if you have a boyfriend maybe his ex? Or an ex boyfriend's current partner?

Hi Whiskey,

Sorry to hear about your scare. It really does seem that someone is trying to give you some advice (albeit in a scary, intense way) but i do remember being very concerned when you posted your job title and workplace in a recent "what do you do for a living" thread.

Kittie is very right - Everyone should remember that no matter how friendly; a forum is a public place and anything you say on it goes into the public domain. There are, at any time, hundreds of people on this forum and not all of them are members. If you say something on a forum, you might as well print it up on a poster and stick them all over town - it's that public.

I'm sure that it will blow over but do always consider your privacy over your publicity. We live in a digital age and we are all subject to a lot of public scrutiny.

Kindest regards,

Rufus

Hey you. See what I miss when I don't get online for a week?

Even if this person thinks their intentions are good by giving you a warning that other people can look you up online and find out a lot about you, they aren't exactly doing it in a nice way.

For a start I don't like how they are being judgmental about you choosing to do this at 18. 18 is basically the age when you become an adult and can make your own choices, so whether they think you are young or not, it's not their business at all.

The bit about your parents finding out sounds like they are threatening to tell them. So let them, as you say they already know and support you. Are you sure this isn't a relative or family friend who disapproves? Either that or I agree that it's maybe someone at your work. Knowing where you work, I doubt they'd take any action anyway if they knew about your burlesque .

Also they have admitted to wanting to freak you out, so that sets off alarm bells for me too. It's not nice to email people with intent to make them feel uncomfortable, they could have said all of the above in a nicer way if they really had your protection at heart.

My suggestions: block them now, and don't reply. If you do use your real name on myspace remove that, I have chosen not to associate mine with my myspace and I am considering having separate myspaces for personal and burlesque friends now. Google yourself from time to time to see what comes up. I am fortunate that nobody can spell my real name, and when my dad googled me once all that came up was my (mostly unused) bebo and a comment where I told my friend I was listening to the Tomb Raider 3 soundtrack and eating a family bag of doritos. He did tease me about it, BUT that is only going to give me a rep as a geeky 90s gamer and a crisp addict. :twisted:

there are also people finding websites which are legal and all over the place. If you are conerned as to what links back to you have a nosy on pipl.com try all the different seach functions such as by username , email and real name.

Originally Posted by Flamin Hell

there are also people finding websites which are legal and all over the place. If you are conerned as to what links back to you have a nosy on pipl.com try all the different seach functions such as by username , email and real name.

Ooh, I don't like that!

There is only one result I don't like which is from a photographer's Flickr account saying "[real name] aka December Charm".

I found that ages ago when googling and asked him to remove it. Which he did, and indeed the photo has been deleted when you click on the link. But it seems to still have the memory of it there.

Originally Posted by Flamin Hell

there are also people finding websites which are legal and all over the place. If you are conerned as to what links back to you have a nosy on pipl.com try all the different seach functions such as by username , email and real name.

That site is really interesting! Thankfully I found NOTHING on it about me (burlesque name or real name) I honestly couldn't be happier. Not so good for publicity but I do like the feeling that I haven't been completely eaten by the 'internet world' and I still have my privacy .