Thread: Terrified..

Why are we assuming a man wrote this? Plenty of women behave like this out of a) jealousy b) spiteful 'concern' for the family/workplace i.e. idle gossipers. Was the MySpace avatar/username familar to you?

MySpace seems to be THE place to be if you want socially mal-adjusted people to contact you. With this in mind, if you do use MySpace for business networking or even for hobby networking, you really can't afford to give away personal info - not beacuse you are harbouring a secret but because doing so looks like an invitation to some people to 'get to know you' and so forth. You appear 'open'.

It's also worth considering that once you enter the public domain, it's hard to keep much about yourself private - and what you do keep private, others make up stories to fill in the gaps in their information. You get used to it, but it's not always easy.

It's always creepy and uncomfortable to have this sort of experience but unfortuantely it goes with the territory. Burlesque purposefully straddles the edge between propriety and taboo. If you do this publicly and advertise it, there will always be critics who feel it's their 'right' to tell yo off and so on.

My advice to you Whisky, is to NOT reply to it. Any form of interaction or reaction will encourage their behaviour .

It is most likely someone you do indeed know and before long, they'll make some comment to you that will give their identity away, or someone else will put their foot in it for them.

Don't be too freaked out - just be cautious and make note of anything else that is odd which happens and be satisfied in the knowledge that you have ruffled someone's feathers without even meaning to.:twisted:
Ladies - if you are performing anywhere, always take a chaperone or manager with you. This should always be factored in to your financial arrangements and should be expected by bookers.

You could worry all day about what they know and how they found out, but i don't think it would help. It could be someone you know or it could be someone miles away who just happens to be good with computers and wants to freak you out.
I pretty much bypassed myspace and went straight for a website, mainly because i had myspace for acting work and in the three years i had it up and running i didn't find it all that useful. I did start a facebook page recently and because it was set for networking i found quite a few people started requesting me as a friend, so unless i know the name or they were friends of a friend i didn't accept.
Don't worry about it unless they contact you again, and unless you have already replied just ignore it.On the brightside at least you took their warning and removed some personal information, so it's not all bad. And if you are still unhappy about it, then you could always contact the police for advice, better to be forewarned and know what to look out for.

Originally Posted by White Knight

Hey not all White Knights are creeps you know But in this case you are probably right

Oops! :disbelief: :embarrassed:

Present company (being a real white knight of course ) excepted then? :lol:

Originally Posted by Lilly de Lure

Oops! :disbelief: :embarrassed:

Present company (being a real white knight of course ) excepted then? :lol:

Of course :lol:

If i were you i'd save the messages and also screenshot them so that you have double the copies of it so that if that person does contact you again with something like that then you have solid evidence if you wish to take it to the administrators or even the police if it got really bad.

I myself haven't have threatening messages on Myspace but i have had disgusting ones where i've been asked for sex etc and even asked to help someone lose their virginity. I just delete them and haven't heard anything back from any of those people since.

Hopefully that awful person won't contact you even again but keep copies of the message for a while just incase he does.

Peace and Love
Dannii

I would lay pretty good odds this is a local and probably someone you know - maybe an ex BF or co-worker? Probably the worst thing you could do is escalate it any way. Keep the message and don't respond to it. If it does escalate (unlikely I would have thought) you have a paper trail if not you can let it slide into history...

Admittedly the tone of this message is a bit weird, and there are much better ways of putting it, but the message is an important one - this person is saying "don't put personal info on your myspace page, it's not safe!" Don't be freaked out by it, I honestly think that in their head they thought they were helping you by sending it and probably didn't consider the fact that it comes across as quite creepy from your perspective. It is quite worrying how much info there is out there on certain people of you just look - I had a guy once I tell me all sorts of personal stuff about me - when I asked how on Earth he knew so much stuff, he simply replied that he'd just read through my posts on here!

xx

The tone of the message is neither aggressive nor is it sexually provocative and as they 'don't know your parents' but do refer in the main to what your employer might think, I suspect this is someone who works with you and is perhaps even a little embarrassed by the idea of you stripping off.

As everyone says, keep a note of it but try and shake it off. Do be sure to tell people close to you if anything further arises or, if you suspect there might be something more to it.

Sometimes people you actually know leave comments on your networking sites and reffer to you by name as this is the name they know you by. I went through mine deleting these and also worked out that anyone could know: my real name, my little sisters names (eeep), my high school, what university I went to, what subject, year and course I was in, where I work, and the cafes I frequent. So I delete all these now - just a tip. People will find you but you can make it difficult for them to get more personal information as comments posted come up in internet searches.

Hi honey,

Although the message is neither aggressive or threatening it is definitely highly inappropriate. He/she does not identify themselves and is speaking to you about personal issues but is not expressing why they feel justified in doing that too you.
It could be just a freak looking to provoke a reaction from you. But I wouldn't take that chance. Make sure you have only your burlesque information on that myspace page. Make it as professional as poss:

1. set up an email account that you ONLY use for burlesque bookings etc - only give this out to legit individuals who want to contact you for burlesque purposes.

2. put NO other contact info on your profile page

3. when writing in the About Me section etc only write about your burlesque (your routines, availability, experience etc) DON'T put anything about yourself outside of that, especially your day job or usual hang outs.

4. have a separate myspace page for the 'real' you. You can add only people you know and set it to private.


If you can (which I think you should be able to) BLOCK this individual from contacting you again.
If they do contact you again report them to myspace.
If their messages become AT ALL threatening contact the police right away.

As I said, it's prob just a harmless person wanting to provoke a reaction but there is no harm in taking percussion to stay safe and to stop people from making you feel like this again.


Pixie :love: