Selling out...

Amelie Soleil · #1 (**permalink**) 11-19-2006, 11:05 PM

Well, my much maligned gripes about being a penniless performer are to come to an end... i'm joining the eternally tired land of proper job full timers as of tomorrow...

My long denied need for shoes (damn you irregular choice damn you...) pretty vintage clothes and a big assed expensive french tightwire have finally beaten me...(oh plus rent, food and all those unimportant things)

So... no training full time, back to pie eating and trying to squeeze in performances here and there.

However, my new job is fantastic, I'm a manager for Benefit Cosmetics and get to paint people, sparkle and sing Christmas songs all day long. Plus oodles of free make-up....

But seriously folks, please reassure me... I hope I'm not selling out... I want to go back to performing but three years of baked beans on toast and primark is enough for now surely?? I'm still going to train three times a week and hopefully perform once a month...Surely other performers have to do this? My partner would rather eat his own hand than give up performing so I'm not feeling too special right now...

I guess it was this or corporate stilt whoring season... don't know if I could face that again....

ARGH!!! I don't want a career! I don't want to grow up, have a salary and have to meet targets.... I wanna dangle from things all day long, get burnt, bruised and cry when I can't climb a rope cos my feet are bleeding...

bugger...

vicxx

Warren · #2 (**permalink**) 11-20-2006, 04:12 PM

Don't feel low Vic, you know you'll still be performing and training whenever possible.

And you know you can perform at all my shows whenever you're available and the venue allows. As can Edd.

And of course you ain't sold out - we all have to eat, dress and have a roof over our heads.

Now about the make-up . . . . . can I get some freebies? And can you teach me how to put it on properly?

W xx

heathersweet · #3 (**permalink**) 11-20-2006, 05:12 PM

Your nerves are just frayed.

Having a restricted income for an extended period of time restricts your diet ( as in beans ) and restricts what you can do because money has a vicious cycle to it in that you gig and make it and spend it to gig and you have to restrict a lot of yourlife style.

You've made a stratejic move.
Think of it as a gap year.

Just because your doing a 9/5 now doesn't stem your creativity and by the sounds of it it's enjoyable so it's not as though your in the position of having to do something you loath.

If you wanted to be the ceo of mcdonalds and wanted to marry a tory m.p i would start to worry.

You can loose yourself in art but art will never be lost to you.
xxxxxxxxxxx don't worryxxxx be happy xxx ,,,,,,

Warren dear unless you get some slap on your face soon this make-up thing will become an obsession.x bless.

DecadentDoll · #4 (**permalink**) 11-20-2006, 05:45 PM

Heather and Warren hit the nail on the head.

We all need to eat. Pay bills. Plenty of superstar performers had to work banal jobs in order to get ahead. Without some sort of rich patron or family or such stuff... a job is a necessity sometimes.

And wow, Benefit. It could be a lot worse

Wild Card Kitty · #5 (**permalink**) 11-20-2006, 06:40 PM

Absolutely! And I should point out a bonus that it has been that in my most banal jobs it reminds me of how much I HAVE to do other things and I often have my craziest ideas as a kind of reaction with my mind rebelling!
It's only temporary and yeah, Benefit... could be worse...
xx

Amelie Soleil · #6 (**permalink**) 11-20-2006, 08:30 PM

thanks so much everyone; I feel much much better.

As you say, could be much worse than benefit (my twelves hour days working for a pharmacy was evil incarnate) and warren you know I'm going to plant you in one of our little chairs and go sparkle crazy! Edd's already chewing at the bit!

I hope it is a strategic move, I just got scared that I would miss out but realisitically, I wasn't exactly fully booked performance wise.

Ahh... so heres to snaffling tester pots and smelling divine all day long...

love vicxx

Kittie · #7 (**permalink**) 11-20-2006, 10:10 PM

You've got to do what's right for you and it sounds like you have the ideal situation.

I've been performing for years but it's only been in the last two years that this has become my full time occupation - very few people can really be a burlesque or cabaret performer and that's it. Much of my own work now involves negotiating work for other performers and organising events.

When I first set up MoB, I was a full time student with a part time job too.

At one point I worked for Estee Lauder in Harvey Nichols, Edinburgh - never again. I always envied those on the Benefit, Pout or Mac counters.

Good luck with it! I'm sure you can use the job to evangelise burlesque to all those who like sparkly glitter and such!

Cherry Noir · #8 (**permalink**) 11-20-2006, 10:23 PM

Just wanted to let you know that you don't seem to be selling out in the slightest - as everyone else has already said, you need to eat damn it, not to mention buy shoes and other necessities! You have to look at it the other way around - you are a performer who happens to be doing the 'normal work' thing for a while, instead of someone stuck in a nine-to-five who occasionally gets to do something interesting. And if nothing else, Benefit, wow, staff-discount-arama! I used to work in Selfridges, and the only concessions that seemed to enjoy themselves and get dressed up with the rest of the floor, etc were Benefit & MAC, so I bet you'll enjoy it more than you think. Good luck!